"Canine witness to 21st Century: Reptiles in swimming pools" (Connoisseurs will recognize [l. to r.] Gwen Lee, Joel McCrea, and Raquel Torres in a publicity photo 1931)
$50

"Canine witness to 21st Century: Carjacking" (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Greater Gangster Stories April 1933, Look Magazine March 1948 and Crash by J.G. Ballard)
$50

"The Trump organization franchises the Solar System: MARS a Lago" (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Film Fun March 1938 and Out of this World Adventures December 1950)
$50

"The Meet-and-Greet was a great success until the Martian guests found copper wires tastier than chevre crackers" (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Film Fun June 1937 and Fantastic Story Quarterly Summer 1950)
$50

Why walk through life when you can dance? (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Gay Book Magazine Spring 1934 and Argosy Weekly February 19, 1938)
$50

First, eliminate the source of the flower pollen (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Greater Gangster Stories July 1933 and Thrilling Love August 1947)
$50

Because the pirates had only one rope to spare for a swing, everyone else had to jump (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Movie Merry-Go-Round November 1936 and Action October 1953)
$50

The saloon sing-along ended with her tabletop tap dance (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Ace-High March 1927 and Film Fun January 1937)
$50

ISIS lives (Connoisseurs will recognize a pin-up by Ernest Chiriacka and the cover of War Novels June 1930)
$50

Paddling a machine gun dingy around the ocean dodging enemy submarines still gave her plenty of time to show off her new brassiere (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Top-Notch June 1936 and Spicy-Adventure Stories December 1942)
$50

Another politician caught by the Me Too movement (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Gangster Stories August 1930 and Bedtime Stories 1936)
$50

The boss quickly realized that she could handle a pistol even better than a lipstick (Connoisseurs will recognize the covers of Gangster Stories January 1930 and February 1931)
$50

The welcoming committee was eager to dispense with the introductory formalities (Connoisseurs will recognize a pin-up of Walt Otto and Black Mask February 1929)
$50

Her roommate required a different type of persuasion (Connoisseurs are directed to the covers of Stag Magazine November 1955 and Spicy Adventure November 1936)
$50

The double date was lots of fun until somebody suggested veggie burgers (Connoisseurs are directed to the covers of Spicy Detective of October 1936 and September 1941)
$50

Just then Mildred decided to duck out for more salsa. (Connoisseurs are directed to the covers of Spicy Detective for October 1937 and December 1940.)
$50

Nobody expected Esther to be packing such a serious blade in her bra. (Connoisseurs are directed to the covers of Spicy Detective for February 1935 and November 1938.)
$50

Hot butter 10-28-42
$50

Frank Zappa: "Art is making something out of nothing and selling it."
$50

Keith Richards: "It's great to be here. It's great to be anywhere."
$50

John Stuart Mill: "That so few dare to be eccentric marks the chief danger of the time"
$50

Forgot to floss 5-18-38
$50

NOT al dente 3-6-40
$50

Annette Bening and Warren Beatty
$50

Too much garlic 11-14-53
$50

Clark, Jean and a large cockatiel
$50

Sean, Madonna and three peach-faced lovebirds
$50

Miley, Liam and two ducks
$50